Gravitas WINS Radio

**Joseph:** Hello and welcome to _Gravitas WINS Conversations_. I'm your host, Joseph Jude.

Generative AI can now answer almost any technical question. It can write code, debug systems, and even suggest architectural designs. But for ==most ambitious CTOs, answers aren't what they're looking for. What they often need is not more knowledge but more clarity—about themselves, their teams, and their leadership styles==.

My guest today is Viktor Nyblom, a CTO coach, angel investor, and author of some of the most insightful writings on technical leadership that I've read. Viktor works with CTOs who are already performing at a high level and helps them unlock new levels of influence, energy, and organizational impact. His coaching isn’t about giving you answers. It’s about challenging how you think, so you can scale not just systems but yourself.

We’re going to talk about what a human coach can give that AI can never do, why even the smartest leaders get stuck in old ways of thinking, and why sometimes even CTOs like me need someone else to point out what we can’t see for ourselves.

Before we begin, may I request you to subscribe, leave a review, and share this podcast with fellow business leaders.

Hi Viktor, welcome to the conversation.

**Viktor:** Hi Joe, happy to be here.

**Joseph:** Let’s start with this, Viktor. Why do elite CTOs—who are already performing at a high level—still need a coach?

**Viktor:** From my point of view, it's fairly simple: we're all human. ==As humans, we can’t really see ourselves objectively==. We have an image in our head of who we are, where we’re going, and how we’ll get there—but our field of view is narrow.

By hiring a coach, you expand that view. ==You get help seeing more options and uncovering your blind spots==. That’s the main reason for coaching. It sounds trivial, but it’s powerful.

**Joseph:** Absolutely. You said it well—we all need to expand our field of vision, and a coach helps with that.

Now obviously, we’re living in the ChatGPT era. I can ask ChatGPT any question. I can feed in all my thoughts and even ask what my blind spots are. Given that, what can a human coach offer that ChatGPT can’t?

**Viktor:** Great question. Let me say—Claude is one of my personal AI coaches. It's great. But here’s what Claude or any AI can’t do: look me in the eye and ask, “Really? Are you sure?”

And then watch me flinch. That moment when I start wondering, “Was I really being honest with myself?” There’s something deeper there—and AI can’t pick up on that yet.

Also, there’s something magical about the human connection between two people. AI can mimic it, but it can’t replicate it.

**Joseph:** Exactly. AI can fake it, but seasoned performers—CTOs, surgeons, CEOs—they can sense that fakeness instantly.

So let’s say I reach out to you and decide to work with you as a coach. What happens next? What’s your coaching model or framework?

**Viktor:** First, we have a conversation to see if we’re a match. I ask you about yourself, where you want to go, what your barriers are. That’s for both of us—because coaching is a partnership. If we’re not aligned, it won’t work.

Then we spend our first session digging into the transformation you want over the next 3 to 6 months—or maybe a year. What’s your goal? Your dream? Your vision for yourself and your role?

Many people expect me to bring a lot of information. But that’s already on my blog—for free. Coaching is about transformation, not information.

From there, it depends on your goal. Maybe you're building a leadership team, or dealing with relationships. I might help you coach your team, or align with your CEO. That CTO–CEO relationship is critical.

We’ll work biweekly—45 to 60-minute calls—focused on your top barrier. I have a stack of exercises you can do in between, or sometimes it’s just one powerful question to reflect on.

**Joseph:** Fantastic. One of the things you write about often is energy. You place energy even before time management or traditional productivity advice. Why?

**Viktor:** Because ==energy is the multiplier==.

You could also call it intensity. ==If you do something with low energy, the output is mediocre. But if your energy is high, you’re focused, and you attack the problem—you can achieve amazing results==.

The catch is: how do you do this without crashing? If you go in with high energy, you need recovery time. Otherwise, you’ll burn out.

**Joseph:** Are you talking about mental or physical energy? And how does it show up in something like a podcast, for example?

**Viktor:** Both. Physical and mental energy—and for some, spiritual energy too.

Preparation starts the day before. You know this. If I didn’t sleep well, I can’t show up with full energy. Sleep is number one.

Then comes routine. I feed my cats, have a coffee, and journal. That grounds me. It helps me focus and sets the tone for the day.

That’s how I show up with energy for things like this podcast.

**Joseph:** Let’s touch on burnout. If I keep going with that kind of intensity, I might burn out. How do I notice signs of burnout before I crash?

**Viktor:** I've experienced burnout. The first sign? People around me started saying, “You look tired. You seem stressed.” I ignored them, but they were right.

Another sign is poor recovery. If Monday you have high energy, but it declines through the week and you can’t function on Friday, something’s off.

Also, if you feel like that duck—calm on the surface, but frantically paddling underneath—that’s a warning sign. Lots of effort, no progress.

These are blind spots. A coach helps you notice them.

**Joseph:** Exactly. That’s where a human coach helps. I might say, “I don’t know what’s wrong,” and you could spot it.

Now, about recovery—what works for you?

**Viktor:** Find something you’ll do consistently. That’s key.

For me, I take Saturdays off completely. I work Sunday mornings but reserve Saturdays to disconnect.

I work out 4–5 times a week. That clears my mind. And because I exercise, I care more about eating well. That improves everything. It becomes a virtuous cycle.

**Joseph:** We practice kind of Sabbath at home. Sunday church, no devices. Evenings after 9 pm—no phones. We read, talk, rest. It helps.

Let’s move to another idea you talk about: “The user manual of me.” What is it, and how does it help?

**Viktor:** It comes from one of my core principles—prefer explicit over implicit. Clarity reduces misunderstandings.

So I write down how to work with me. For example, I dislike casual “Hello” messages. Just ask the question directly. That’s how I operate.

Others may prefer small talk. That’s fine. The user manual simply outlines who I am, how I communicate, how I think. It helps teams collaborate better.

**Joseph:** But how do you ensure others follow it?

**Viktor:** You don’t expect instant compliance. I believe ==you have to say something seven times in seven ways before it sticks==. So be patient and compassionate.

**Joseph:** This ties into culture too. In India, we’re very implicit. Saying “no” directly is hard. In European cultures, things are more explicit.

The user manual helps bridge that gap. Even for implicit communicators, it gives a clear reference point.

**Viktor:** That’s beautifully said. And for clarity—Sweden isn’t like Belgium. We’re also non-confrontational. We don’t like offending people either. So I understand what you mean.

**Joseph:** Now, you often say: a CTO must not only scale teams but also scale themselves. What does that look like?

**Viktor:** At first, a CTO writes code. Then you manage people. As the team grows, you step back and pull higher-leverage levers—like setting vision and aligning teams.

Eventually, you’re not writing code at all. ==If you don’t update your self-image, you’ll drift back into lower-leverage work==.

You must shift your identity to match the company’s growth, step by step. It’s hard. Most people get parts of it wrong—and that’s okay.

**Joseph:** You often sign off with “Be a little kinder than necessary.” That’s a beautiful phrase. How does kindness fit in with high performance?

**Viktor:** When you’re in a high-stakes meeting, it’s game time. Bring your full intensity. But after the meeting, we’re just people.

If you're harsh in the moment, you lower the team’s performance. Psychological safety matters.

At Baby Journey, we had a big incident—users couldn’t access articles. That was crisis mode. Everyone stepped up.

But in the postmortem, I told the team, “I don’t care who made the mistake. I care about what allowed it to happen.” That honesty and non-punitive environment builds trust.

**Joseph:** That’s powerful. Focus on the game, not the player.

You also mentioned spiritual energy. Can you expand on that?

**Viktor:** For me, it’s about ==having a higher purpose==. Why are you here?

I believe I’m here to help others succeed. That’s what drives me. If you don’t have that connection to purpose, something feels missing—even if you can’t name it.

**Joseph:** I agree. I once wrote my obituary—what I’d want my wife, kids, and colleagues to say about me. I wrote it 15 years ago.

Recently, I showed it to my wife and son. They said I’ve lived exactly that way. That kind of clarity shapes everything—your work, your relationships, your pursuits.

**Viktor:** That’s incredible. I’ve written product obituaries, but I’m going to write my own personal one now. Thank you for that idea.

**Joseph:** Let’s wrap up with a few rapid-fire questions.

What’s the kindest thing someone has done for you?

**Viktor:** The time and energy my mentor gave me. He helped me so much, free of charge. I don’t know why he did it, but I’m grateful.

**Joseph:** Same here. My mentor opened 6–7 doors for me over the years and never gained anything from it. I asked him how to repay him, and he said, “Pay it forward.”

**Viktor:** Exactly.

**Joseph:** What’s the best leadership quality, and who showed it to you?

**Viktor:** My mom. She was a manager at Volvo. She led with a people-first mindset. I remember one year Volvo canceled the Christmas dinners. My mom hosted one at home for 25 colleagues. That stuck with me.

**Joseph:** I see why you do what you do. Finally, what’s your definition of living a good life?

**Viktor:** I think it was Toby Lutke from Shopify who said: “Going on a journey solving hard problems with people you love.” That’s it.

**Joseph:** What a perfect note to end on. Viktor, thank you for your time, insights, and generosity. This was a rich conversation.

**Viktor:** Thank you, Joseph. It was a pleasure.

**Joseph:** I hope you enjoyed our conversation. Please share your takeaways and forward this episode to others who’ll benefit.

Have a life of WINS.